Scenes from Terri's Revolution, Part III
Spurred on by the GOOD WORD of The Weekly Standard, the Armies of Terri's Revolution hath descended into the Countryside today, scorching the earth with REASON and RIGHTEOUSNESS, the happy merger of which the Venerable Lord hath seen fit to swing like a CUDGEL against the THICKE SKULLS of the BASTARD SPAWN who theaten Libertie. At yonder Hospice, a humble FARMER — ragged in feature yet noble in speech — was moved to bring his viewes forward in PUBLICK:
"'Tis surprising to see how rapidly a panic will sometimes run through a country. All nations and ages have been subject to them. Britain has trembled like an ague at the report of a French fleet of flat-bottomed boats; and in the fourteenth century the whole English army, after ravaging the kingdom of France, was driven back like men petrified with fear; and this brave exploit was performed by a few broken forces collected and headed by a woman, Joan of Arc. Would that heaven might inspire some Jersey maid to spirit up her countrymen, and save her fair fellow sufferers from ravage and ravishment! Yet panics, in some cases, have their uses; they produce as much good as hurt. Their duration is always short; the mind soon grows through them, and acquires a firmer habit than before. But their peculiar advantage is, that they are the touchstones of sincerity and hypocrisy, and bring things and men to light, which might otherwise have lain forever undiscovered. In fact, they have the same effect on secret traitors, which an imaginary apparition would have upon a private murderer. They sift out the hidden thoughts of man, and hold them up in public to the world . . . ."
YEA! And YEA AGAIN, we say!
